Hey y'alls, I'm Paisley. Ain't I cute? My mommas got me in this here pretty girl contest, and I gonna win. Theres lots of pretty girls 'round here, but I gonna win, cause if I don't, my momma said she gonna kill Mickey Mouse. I love Mickey, and I don't want her to kill him. So I gotta win.
Do you like my costume? Momma said she saw it in this movie about a working girl. This girl had a hard job. She had to be outside all the time, which is sooo bad for your skin. And she had to work with all sorts of mean people, like her...um, what did momma call it? A pimp! That's right. I love that word. It's so cute. There are four letters in pimp. P-I-M...um, G?
Okay now, Is gonna go. They just called my name. They said, "Okay folks, here comes Paisley to the mainstage." That's how I know it's my turn. That, and they start to play my music. I can't remember what the song is. Something by my momma's favorite band, Warrant. She love them, cause she say their drummer man was almost my step-daddy. I wish I could play Katy Perry. But momma know best.